Messages From Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith
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New Member of the Club!
Indeed it IS impressive. I borrowed my wife's InterNet account (not having one of my own yet) and toured the facility just a few moments ago. I was number two on the Guest Book, AAMOF. Thank you, Christopher. Speaking for all SmartAsses everywhere: you did a really _nice_ job! <G> As far as t-shirts and bumperstickers, we'll have to wait until we have a decent amount of artwork and sayings to draw from. And I'm at hera.teleia@juno.com Excellent webpage. As

New Member of the Club!
Been making improvements on the house in preparation for Winter. Things like weatherstripping, caulking some cracks in the masonry of the fireplace, replacing the old skylight in the carport, etc. In actuallity, today I only got organized and spent the day shopping for and buying materials. No, not really an extra, more like an extension. I do want to install it right, though. And it has to go to my desk from the original line. That way I don't have

Smartass Cult
Hmmm yes? Hmmm good question. <G> Why are you asking me? I borrowed an account and was number two in the Guestbook earlier yesterday, right after you. Go and reread it. And no, I did not steal the pen. It was missing when I got there. I've already posted an Email address, but expect a new one shortly And what a lovely aria they were, too. Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion

New Member of the Club!
LOL! What? What! WHAT FER CHRIST'S SAKE!!!!??? Oh. Okay. I put your name on the ballot. Now will you uncock that cannon? <G> Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
For shame, Ed. Don't you know that not only are you generally prized around here, but you actually venture into areas that not only does no one else go into, but that also are largely unmapped? Speaking only for myself, I have come to respect and be wary of your wit and smartass remarks. Many's the dumbfounded fundy (I imagine) who sits up suddenly, smoke coming from their ears, after you've taken them around a corner (postwise) that a moment

New Member of the Club!
Now why aren't I getting any mints on my pillow? <G> I'm overwhelmed. Well, maybe just turgidly whelmed, but that's still a lot. I'll be in contact via netmail or Email to discuss particulars with you. As are we all This address may change sometime soon. I'll keep you aprised of any changes before they happen. Argh. AOL. No, it's just that we just bought a house and there's a lot to fix on it before I

New Member of the Club!
Ah, do I note a dislike of the rank and file? <G> Oddly enough, there may be members who could use such a thing <G> Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
We aim to annoy. It's part of our charm. <G> There's the official slogan of the order, I can see it now. T-shirts, bumper-stickers, etc. Succinct, catchy, and it shows exactly the right attitude. I'm impressed Preston! Why the hell not! Indeed, we should never forget Karl <G> It was where I always keep it behind the sofa cushion. Yes, but I swear that the nun was over eighteen I'm no

New Member of the Club!
How'd you get out of Halfwitt's crawlspace? Well, be careful anyway it could go off and then where would we be? We intend for you to be the most normal-appearing of us, especially when we need you to be the designated driver. What's our chances? Can you pretend to be a bigotted Mormon Minister in Texas who's just popped in to buy some condoms and a pint of Jack Daniels, nevermind them teenage girls in the back

New Member of the Club!
LOL Indeed. Just ask Charles Keating That's okay. We don't actually have any cheerleaders. But we might, someday Judith and the rest of the Harpies have an artistic touch with desserts. Let's just say that they have to be chocolate desserts for obvious reasons Well, I hope he's well, anyway. Even cats need a hobby. Now that I work around dogs and cats all day, your words are

Gravol
Doubly so in the case of Jan, who isn't an official Mr. SmartAss <G> Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club! [1/2]
I got over it, you will too <G> I think everyone's agreed. I'll make a general announcement a little later, just in case It must be being snatched from them by the Holy Spirit! And, not to belabor the obvious, SmartAssitude IS a state of mind. I offerred that if they so choose. If they don't want to, that's fine too. I think the Harpies to be fine women, and I'd be proud to

New Member of the Club!
Indeed. And I respect them greatly. If they don't want affiliation, though, I hope they don't mind that we recognize their SmartAssitude regardless <G> The horror! <G> I haven't checked my mail yet today. I'll respond via the Netmail, if you don't mind. Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
Careful. Raghead will accuse you of kissing my ass. <G> That's okay, Karl we voted you in ANYWAY. So you're buying the first round, right? Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
One tries to combine functionality with art at all times. <G> You wouldn't be vying for a membership, would you? Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
Oh, that's what happened to that floppy drive <G> Am not. I am Richard. <frowning> Richard. Richard. RICHARDRICHARDRICHARD! My, I feel better! How cathartic! Now where was I? Oh, yeah I'll be retiring that Email address I earlier posted in a while, so I've opened a new account specifically for posting on the Website. My new Email address is: Mr.SmartAss.Richard.Smith@juno.com I'm finding deals like that. There's one I'm investigating that

New Member of the Club! [1/2]
Perhaps now we should start rounding up three candidates for The Furies, as Joseph has suggested, elsewhere Well, shit someone's got to pick up and feed the droppings to the fundies, fercryingoutloud <G> Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
<patrick spence mode on> Hey, uh, are you calling me a liar or are you not calling me a liar? <patrick spence mode off> With onions? Or how about we imitate the liver with onions by using NOODLES and saltines, trying to transubstantiate this whole thread? Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith

New Member of the Club!
It's a gift. Surely someone has pointed this out to you before? People are always telling me that I'm a SmartAss. See? At last a philosophy that works! Why the Hell not! True. Another version of it is hidden in Deuteronomy, but I'm not saying where <the above gratuitous comment expressly inserted for the NAMBLA Bitch, who enjoys finding conspiracies everywhere> I swear I am not Ken Young. However, Patrick Spence could be Ken Young. Never forget

The Furies
<drill instructor mode on> What did you call me? I _work_ for a living, Mr <drill instructor mode off> <G> Maybe three real girlies, like the NAMBLA Bitch, Jimson Staalin, and David Raghead I can't think of three others that so punish Xtianity as those three Whoops! Helping \/tian To Stop /\tortion Mr. SmartAss Richard Smith